Short answer: to sooth my perfectionism.
Between eating disorders, stress, and high standards for myself, it became kind of much. I am rather creative, but my mentality has had me quit art for months and years at a time.
I enjoy art and making it and want to help myself enjoy the process, instead of seeing only the end result and getting frustrated when I am not the best straight off the bat.
It’s hard to say when I got like this or to this point, but I really have to let go.
Over the last two to three years I have played with acrylic paint, pouring, impressionism, watercolor, beadwork, jewelry making, knitting, crochet, collage, clay, sculpting, sketching, and the list can go on and on.
I have many creative interests, including fashion and interior design. My problem has been that if I am not impressed with myself or am not good at something to start, I kind of quit and leave it alone and then resent myself for now being able to do it.
It sucks, cause I really like painting, watching people paint, and looking at art too.
Something that stumps me further is that all these artists online have one specific style, color palette, texture, etc.
I am a total amateur, but for some reaon I insist on choosing my permanent style and medium straigh t off the bat. Writing that down sounds ridiculous, but it’s true.
Whether my art is good or not is subjective and I have to just enjoy the process like I used to as a kid.
It’s for me. For my vision. As meditation. For the joy.